Grover

Some of you readers don't know us animals so i thought I'd introduce you to my big brother. That's him. He's bigger than me. He enjoys napping, stealing prey from other cats, waking everyone up at the butt crack of dawn, eating (lots) and getting his head washed by his mommy.

He wouldn't admit it but he's a big fat wussy boy. thankfully, he doesn't stay up late enough to catch me writing this and he never, ever, reads the computer so he'll never know. K?

Cool. I'm chuffed we're on the same page here.

So, I uess you also want to know where he fits in to the family... he's my adoptive bro. he had this really scrappy mama that the pound didn't think was "safe around humans" so they took him and his sister away and gave them to my mama, MamaCat, to raise. He's like glue with her. We all came to the "Fuzzy's" house umpteen years ago with my other real sibs but only us two were COOL enough to stay. People daddy didn't want our mommy to be "put down" (whatever that is- I hear it's REALLY BAD.) so she stayed too.

The Doctor is In

Well, good golly it's been a long time since i got on this infernal thing! i forgot how warm and cozy it can be. Mmmmmmmmmm

It is nice, dear reader, to see that People Mama has had the courage to put a more than decient banner on the blog for once. I liked the snow one but it's not as good as this banner. I mean, LOOK at me! I am so handsome there, heading out to hunt mice and vole and wildebeest.

I stopped writing, dearest reader, because Mama grounded me for being too direct with Miss Annie, Mr. Fred, and Miss Girlie about my feelings. Stoopid MAMA! She can be soooo mean some times about how us cats work things out.

And we HAVE worked things out.

Really.

Fred and I are TIGHT these days. Even Grover likes him now. We pal around and always sleep together in the afternoons when he's around. (Sometimes he goes off for a few days but I'm not allowed to reveal where. pbttht!) he's so cool, he even lets me clean his ears if i want. being a doctor, i know how important it is to maintaining good health. And, really, folks, a cat cannot do a respectable job on the inside by himself. Anyone with a good mother knows this to be true. unfortunately, Fred had a crappy mom who never did that for him so it took a while for him to realize the wisdom of my offers.

Girlie and I have a truce. I ignore her and she ignores me. I sleep on the bed and she has her tower. Only Fred ever gets on that tower. I saw Jack get up there one day and he looked like he'd breached Forth Knox and didn't know what to do with himself. (So he jumped down before anyone could tell on him.)

Annie is still a "little princess." SEE MAMA? I'm *still* controlling my tongue and not calling her the B-word even though you call that stupid mean mama chicken by that word. HUH? HUH? How come *I* can't use that word and YOU can? [Editor's note: I'm the boss and you've got a potty mouth, that's why.] Anyway, I'm practicing being nice to her but she won't play with me. I try to greet her and she hisses and growls, though it's getting better now that I "don't participate" in her "issues." I can lay in my spot on the bed and she can lay in her tower beside it and we can artfully ignore each other. No growling or nothin' Grover is still a p**** though. He gets on the bed and walks across EVERYBODY and threatens to chase Annie so she growls at him still. MamaCat also hasn't learned to "not participate" but she's got kitty PTSD so I think People Mama should go easy on her.

At any rate, Miss Annie isn't home half the time so it doesn't matter what we think of each other. the other day, though, she didn't mind too much when I jumped up beside her to eat some kibbles.... Maybe she secretly loves me?

Anyway, I wanted you to know that even though all you've heard about lately is rain and plants and chickens that us cats are here and doing fine. Daddy didn't mention all the mice we've been catching since the field got cut. It's been GREAT! Man, we catch a mouse a day each if we decide to put half a mind to it. Heck even RUFUS has been catching mice.

Oh, and the chicks, we're cool. Fred is in charge of chick-cat relations and he says they aren't the edible kind so there's nothing to think about with them. besides, they spend most of their time in a cage. :(

The Hens Speak

Dear reader, let me begin by wishing you a joyful end to the year two thousand ten. It's been a doozie for so many people we know that we are not the least bit sad to bid it adieu. Let us all have a pleasant, healthful, and successful two thousand eleven!

Chetworth has also asked me to extend his thanks to the person or persons who sent him the beautiful wreath for Christmas. Fourteen brains between us and this household still can't figure out who the anonymous sender was. The wreath has been very pretty hanging at the entrance to the drive.

This new year's eve marks the start of a new era for our hennies and roos. You see, the girls told me the other day that they "had had ENOUGH with those greedy, sex-crazed, roosters" and that it was my job to "do something about it" or there would be no peace in the barnyard for me.

No, the roos didn't get the axe even though that is the logical thing to have done. Fortunately for them I promised someone special that I wouldn't do them in since they are rather nice roosters, as roosters go. Anyone want a rooster?

What I did do was create a little bachelor pen for six of the little men. They now have their own coop, roosts, sand bath, and covered area next to the big coop. I managed to put most of the boys in there just about sunset but they flew the fence just to prove a point. Little did they know or remember that there are fixes for that....

About eight o'clock I went out with a wee flashlight and collected them one at a time, climbed over the fence, and clipped their glorious barred wings with my scissors of dismay. Mr. Horace, our red banty frizzled Cochin, did not receive such treatment as he knows he can't fly anyway. Horace was, most sensibly, already cozy in the rooster coop. The girls will be happy.

The hennies do still have two roosters living with them as it was always my intention to only allow those who weren't too aggressive with the girls to live with them once I got it sussed out. Red is a smooth red bantam Cochin who seems pretty laid back. Guido is my pet chicken.... small, hen-pecked, and thoroughly sorry looking... so he gets to stay in the big coop out of pity if nothing else. Everyone seems to treat him like a girl anyway.

The bachelors will live in their little yard for a time while I erect a bit of temporary fencing in the walled garden. If they're going to stay then they can earn their keep by scratching the soil bare of weeds back there.

Stratheden Farm: Year 2

Buster Goes Sledding

In a few days we'll be able to say (both) the Fuzzys have been on the farm for a year. A whole year! Frankly, I can't remember it very well. I know I spent a lot of time dead exhausted, swearing at packing boxes, digging, rearranging furniture, or preserving. Good thing we have this blog, eh? We can just look back to a date and see what we were doing. It's kinda cool that way.

So what are we planning for Year 2? Hmm... more zucchini and Seminole pumpkins. (Mr. Fuzzy actually LIKES eating the pumpkins. This is no small miracle.) Probably a few more foster kitties and lots of updates about small town socializing. I might even give y'all another recipe or two.

Resolutions? Eat better, walk more, cut firewood for next year. We're working on a wish list of projects we'd like to do around the farm but I think we'll need some help. If you want to buy a lovely house in New Mexico, please let us know. There's one just outside town on offer at a VERY reasonable price.
Hi All!!!!!!! It's Chetworth! Didja miss me? Mama left the internet up so I'm gonna finish this and get it posted for her. She's off doin' somethin' in the workshop. Rocky the dog says that a new kitten showed up yesterday so I'm thinking that's what she's up to. At least it's not in the house!

We didn't write Santa for toys this Christmas so I'm writing Baby New Year instead. If you all would talk to Baby New Year for us maybe he'll bring us some of what we want as well as what we need. Here's my letter so far, maybe you could proof read it for me?

Dear Baby New Year,

You are the prettiest New Year I have ever seen. I really like your white blanket. I hope you are wrapped up tight because it's awfully cold out there! How do you stay warm when it's negative wind chill??? Do you have a heated cozy like Hodge had?

Mama has been a very good girl. She actually called people she didn't know well and went socializing like a normal(ish) person. She took in eight new animals (Mama says it was a nice thing to do but I'm not so sure...) and didn't even roast the puppy with sweet potatoes and celery when he made us angry. She also learned how to build a rippin' good fire in our Century Fireplace to keep us warm. That was a very good thing!!! Grover and I like to sit in the big chairs when it's going!

Please grant her a wood shed, a root cellar, and enclose part of the porch as a solarium. She also wants to get the kitchen painted, a brand new marmoleum floor in there, the bedroom woodwork completed, and ...if you can get us a good price on the old house... to get a photo studio built for Mr. Fuzzy. Us cats want a solarium (boy that's a hard word!) too so we can sit in the sun where it's warm.

Mr. Fuzzy wants that studio too, and a guest house under it. He also wishes for all new windows and for that darned house to sell at a really good price! While we're at it... can you send him a lightly used Kabota tractor with a bucket and the little backhoe attachment? You know the one he's been looking at online, I'm sure... No doubt Mr. Fyzzy will add a wish or two in his own letter to you but I thought I'd get this off straight away because he's pretty busy with another editing job and he might not get it done in time.

Us cats want you to keep the vet away ALL year, make us not get those yucky worms, make the puppy be nicer to us, and pleas, Baby New Year, can you please let me win the standoff over who can sleep on the bed? Right now only those smelly babies go up there and I really really reeeeeeeelly want to sleep next to mama and papa. It's extra soft.

I guess I should add something in for the doggles. Ummm. Lots of big bones and Rufus to Please Calm Down. Your big sister did a good job but you need to finish it for her, OK? I guess they want to keep the vet away too, if you can.

I guess that's all the wishes I know of. I hope you have a good year.

Chetworth

P.S. You can combine the cellar with the guest house & studio to make things more convenient for yourself.

P.S.S. Fredster would like a giant bowl of canned food.

P.S.S. I just found out there IS a kitten in the workshop. Buster smelled it! I asked papa and He said her name is Stubby and she lost part of her tail and needs a friend 'cause she's extra scared. I hope she finds her tail soon. It would be weird to loose my tail... but I bet Jack Tar would steal it so he could wear TWO if Rufus didn't just eat it first. That dog will try to eat ANYTHING! (Even Christmas ornaments.)

A Letter fron Your Most Esteemed and Favorite Cat Friend

Greetings, my devoted Public, have you missed me?

Mama says you're both in some far away country so I hope you can still read this. Do they have cats where you are? I hope so. Have you been keeping up with the posts? If you have then that means you know things have gone from bad to worse around here... AGAIN. These humans of mine reeely need to just stop with the adding of animals. (Well, except the chicken idea. I like chicken. Yum! Yum!)

Not ONLY have they brought home ANOTHER dog but they're letting that ugly puppy out of the kitchen to PLAY. Can you imagine?????? We aren't safe hardly ANYWHERE. If those two aren't playing mouthy-mouthy then they're making a racket chewing those stupid bones or -- this is the worst! -- snoring at Mama's feet.

I ain't afraid of those dogs. Nope, no sir, no way.

But I aint stupid either!

That black one likes to play chase and Mama says he's not trying to eat us (Buster and Miss. Lilly say so too) but I jump up and away just so he knows not to do it. I'm not like the others who hiss and swat and throw a fit. Why bother? They're just dumb DOGS! Get up off the floor and they TOTALLY forget you exist. Not like that stupid Girlie Girl who keeps on growling all night after you've walked past her stupid butt! Dogs have NO MEMORY so once you're gone they forget you exist. Mr Tam taught me that and HE'S the SMARTEST CAT I'VE EVER KNOWN! Miss Lilly studied under him before I was ever born and she learned how to not be scared of ANY dumb dog. She'll even sit on a low box and watch the dogs roughhouse for an hour. Lilly is The Coolest! I don't want to get trampled so I stay away unless we're having treat time.

Have I told you about Treat Time? Mama invented it. All we have to do is all show up and whoever is there gets lots and lots and LOTS of treats from the jar. Sometimes we even manage to get our noses into the jar when Mama's not looking and THEN WE PIG OUT! Even the dogs are allowed to have treats at treat time.... though we make Mama put the puppy in the kitchen and that new little one has to stay further away. EVERYBODY loves treat time. Except Girlie, but she's a (Sorry, Mama made me delete that word.) All we have to do to get the treats is not hiss or growl. I know it's a total bribe but, hey, it's TREATS.

Oh, yeah, and the other thing that happened is that Mama changed our kibbles so we get junk food ALL the time now, not just when we run out of the fancy stuff and Mama stops at the grocery for something to tide us over until the Hippie Store gets the other food in again. The babies had some tummy trouble so we can't have food with fish guts in it any more. :( I liked the fishy food! The good news is they are feeling all better now so my little students can study with me again. Buster and Ann are taking lessons from me on how to be therapy cats. They're pretty darn good already! Figures.... they're the same kind of color as me. ORANGE CAT'S ARE THE BEST!

OK, this is getting long now. I have so much to tell you but it's fall and that means we're having to keep the neighborhood clear of evil mice. Some of the neighbors don't have cats so we go to there houses and kill the mice there too. Mr. Harmon is nice and doesn't have a dog so Jack goes there a lot and I go all the way to the end of the road and help out because their cat died a few weeks ago. It's a LOOONG walk so I'm pretty tired after my twice daily patrols. that's why I haven't written in so long. The good news is we've been successful- no mice in the house AT ALL so far!

Hope you're having fun wherever you are.

Love,

Dr. Chetworth
Chief Therapist, Stratheden Farm


PS- Here's a picture of the last mouse we let Mama catch. Now we just dispatch them in the field because there are so many we don't have to share any more.

Update on We Cats

Sorry I've not written to you for a while. Mommy has had me grounded for ages JUST because I wouldn't come inside before dark and only then after she'd chased me around the whole farm and then I'd saunter inside using only the office door. It wasn't so bad.

Mama shut me up in her studio where I got the cat tree all to myself and there weren't any annoying little cats to annoy me and no horrible adult cats to chase and insult me. But without any trees to climb, moles to hunt, or internet to surf I did get kind of bored. Yeah. That's right. She took away my Animal Planet.com MEANIE!!!

Then she let me out again for a week or so and then we ALL got LOCKED UP when that awful new cat... Hodge, Podge, Hoagie, Baloney... whatever his name is... showed up. Daddy says it's because that cat looked very ill and might make us sick and DIE. I'd believe it. I've never seen a cat THAT skinny. Now he's all fat and smug and won't leave the porch no matter how much we hiss at him.

Did I say "we"? I didn't get to tell you that news did I? Stupid Mommy only gave me computer privileges yesterday so i couldn't tell you before. Anyway, since we've all been cooped up inside we've had to call a truce, us cats. Then Mommy started giving us treats (God's gift to cats!!!!!!!) just for being in the same room together so i decided this was pretty cool and I quit hissing at the babies. They're still officially horrible but they know the string game and let me take my preferred place on the bed when I want it AND they know that I am King of the Bath Mat. So it's good.

We're friends now. Fred is my protege and so is Buster. I finally got back at Girlie for being SO MEAN to me... Me and Grover finally ran her off for good the other day. Mommy and Daddy are pretty sure she's just gone to live under the workshop... that's our Switzerland... and she can stay there!!!

Gotta go.... it's laundry folding time!

Bah!

Humbug! Mama just set me up with my own Blogger account so that readers wouldn't be confused thinking that SHE writes these posts. Ha! I AM A SMART CAT. But I am kinda ticked off to see that the last post featured a picture of the mini girl cat. Evil things!

Mama says I'm supposed to be writing on the things I've been overseeing here on the farm OKAAAAY MAHM! (Mom's still stuck cleaning that room of hers.)

So outside, in my domain, has been all in an uproar. Mama kept us inside part of the day for Two Whole Days (meanie!) because this guy called Mr. Simpson The Cattle Farmer Next Door came over with a noisy tractor and stuff stuck on behind it. Each day the stuff changed and now the scary tall grass is all gone. I've seen Daddy "mow" but this guy was waaaaayyyyyy faster and I *think* the big blocks of grass smelling things are where he put it. I didn't get to see how but a quick Googling leads me to believe he used something called a "round bailer" to make them.

They're sort of pretty and we can climb up on them but it's all in the hot sun so not fun most of the day.

OK... job done. Now I can tell you what else I saw today. I saw Mama let the short haired orange baby out into the patio today. I don't think Mama saw me watching from the day lily patch but I saw this With My Own Eyes! They were only out for twenty minutes or so but STILL!