18 June 2010

1/1/1936 -- 6/18/2010

Thom & his girlfriend Lucrecia

Some of our dear readers will know that Mrs. Fuzzy spent most of the month of May in Tucson helping care for her dad and get him moved into a "long term" care facility. He had not been well for many, many, years and elected to forgo all treatment except minimal palliative care about two years ago. To say his doctors have been gobsmacked at his ability to survive as long as he did is a grand understatement.

Today, his illnesses finally got the better of him. Or, rather, he finally decided to let go. That's how his family does it. We hope he's 25 again and dancing away with Marilyn Horne at the big jazz joint in the sky like he always wanted. In respect for his wishes, there will be no funeral or fuss, but his ashes will be returned to his favorite mountain in Maine.

Thank you to everyone who has let me know I'm in their hearts & prayers. It is a true blessing to know you are there in whatever manner you are able. Just your condolences is enough to lighten my heart. May the Creator bless you all.


Lausanne said...

I am sure there is a sense of relief that his challenges are behind him...I'm glad you had that lengthy visit with him recently. Now you can focus your parental care and attention on your Mom's upcoming challenges.
This week I had the unnerving experience of playing music at an adult day care facility with my own mother in attendance. As she fell asleep most ungraciously with her mouth open before me, I could begin to acknowledge all the bright vivacity she has lost in last 8 months.... She no longer can say my name but she recognizes me and breaks into a smile every time she sees me. We don't converse but then there never was much of that between us anyway. Yesterday I went to visit her and she smiled in happiness that I was there, but within 5 minutes was sleeping in her chair. I did the only thing I could to spend some quality time with her...I sat at her feet, peeled off her socks and massaged her feet and calves for quite a while...such flakey ancient skin !
She opened her eyes long enough to smile in pleasure and went back to her dreams.
At this point I am grateful for whatever there is I can still share with my mother. You never know when the next circuit will fail...

judy borron said...

April, so sorry to hear of the passing of your father, but as your friend Lausanne said, there can be a sense of relief that a struggle is over. I know when my father passed, the tears had long before been shed as he declined. Keeping you in my thoughts, and glad you were recently with him.

SarahB said...


I'm so sorry for your father's passing. Even a long expected death that is a relief of much suffering...it's still a death.

As mom mentioned, we certainly experienced in Grandpa Deer's long decline someone who lived long past doctor's expectations--and the grief was and is a long process. I grieve what he suffered and also grieve that he's gone.

I'm glad you got to spend time with him before the end. My best to you and your family during this time.

Sarah Borron

Anonymous said...

April, We are so sorry to see that you Pa died. It is really difficult to go through those transitions, but a privilege to be there when it happens. Robert and I send our best.

Susan B